A person that simply cannot be happy for another person’s success is usually known as a ‘hater’. So rather than be happy they make a point of exposing a flaw in that person.
Hating: the result of being a hater, is not exactly jealousy.
The hater doesn’t really want to be the person he or she hates, rather the hater wants to knock someone else down a notch.
Susan: You know, Kevin from accounting is doing very well. He just bought a house in a very nice part of town. Jane (hater): If he is doing so well why does he drive that ’89 Taurus?
There is No Honor Among Haters
I’m still in a quandary over this, I can’t figure out what was behind the behavior of this individual. The bottom line is that I was embarrassed in front of a group of peers by a person “of power”.
To make a long story short, this individual was calling me Annie Schwarzenegger, which in my mind was the equivalent of saying that I look like a man. There were additional comments, I was asked if I look in shiny surfaces often. A clear insinuation that I am vain because I choose to take care of myself and my health. I liken it to someone calling me fat, it evoked the same feelings. I suppose that because I am fit, it was somehow justified in his mind. It was a small intimate group and I was mortified. It was very embarrassing. Interestingly, it doesn’t matter what your appearance, anyone commenting negatively about you or your physique is hurtful.
This “hater” was unaware of my massive weight loss and I didn’t feel inclined to share the information. He was able to take something that I have worked so incredibly hard for and am extremely proud of and turn it into a joke. I appreciate that everyone is entitled to their own opinion and I understand that this lifestyle and appearance isn’t mainstream. However, I believe that it still commands respect.
The drive and determination required to create a physique worthy of being on stage should be acknowledged and appreciated regardless of aesthetic preference. I believe it is indicative of ones character, it exemplifies strength and perseverance.
Evidently, when you are fit some people think it is socially acceptable to berate you, that it somehow won’t be perceived as negative. When I was overweight, no one ever had the nerve to call attention to it, at least not to my face.
People should be respectful of each other and their individuality. We are ALL really, the same.
Lisa Kandel Jones
Fitmark Ambassador 2013
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